Nah, seriously though, I need to reintroduce myself because I’m starting over. I’ve been doing this music thing for a very long time and it took me this long to really get it. And when I say “get it” I mean honest and truly realizing what I have inside of me and most importantly why.
As with all career/entrepreneurial development, I had my fair share of failures, mishaps, and hard lessons to learn. And somewhere along the way, I lost it. I lost my reason. The whole reason why I took the risk for music in the first place – gone. And when that happens it is the greatest deception. Suddenly, everything that has happened, all the blood, all the sweat, all the many, many, many tears becomes worthless, a complete waste of time. Everything is doubted and discounted.
But then one of the songs I wrote came on during an iTunes shuffle moment and I was home. I was in the temple. I was at peace. It was starting to come back. So I sat for a week and thought about really pursuing music again. Being consistent again, committing to it again. But in order to do that I had to have a clear vision of why I was doing it. It had to be more than the peace I felt. It had to be more than my gut. I had to know. So, for a week I asked myself why music?
I took so much time because somewhere along the way it became about record deals, financial gain, ego, competition and glory. That pursuit got me so close, but eventually nowhere. What else could it be? And I remember how I started. It was about community, using music to build my community, connect with my community, tell the story of my community. It was bigger than me and what I could have or accomplish. It was about what change could I affect and not just for my own life but for yours as well. If you could hear me and it lifts you up, makes you smile, makes you dance, gives you strength or whatever it is you need – if my music did that… well, then that is the Grammy for me.
I know some of you may be skeptical still, so I will put my (little) money where my mouth is. I’m a musician. But I have a job because music does not yet pay even close to all the bills. However, here where I am, unknown and average income, I pledge that any money I make from music, I will donate 50% of it to charity (more on that in coming posts). I make music to do good and doing good has nothing to do with being rich or famous. If I can do it now when I have nothing, then I can be trusted to do it when I have more than enough. I will try to document this lofty journey as much as I can. I’m as interested as you are to see what comes of it.